Cheaply Drawn Kids first started way back in 2003 with the picture of an unrecognizable K beating a jock with a baseball bat drawn on the back of a suicide prevention pamphlet. From there, it’s gone through a couple dozen remakes. It started as the Cheaply Drawn Teen Angst Squad, then it was 15 Minute Comics, from 2006-2011 it was Seedy K until I found out that name already belonged to someone. But what can ya do? Fortunately the original comics weren’t all that popular (namely because I suck at marketing) so the strips you currently see are a revamp of the whole series. Plus the art is better now.
You’ll notice some inconsistencies in the art. This is because I recently switched to all digital art. I’m not used to this, so you can literally watch me become a better artist! Wee! CDK will try it’s hardest to update at least twice a week, hopefully Tuesdays and Thursdays, but don’t be surprised if I get the itch and update 6 times in one week, cuz I’m gracious like that.
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NEW READERS! Catch up on the stories right here! Of course, it’s not the same, but it can at least refresh you!
The Romantic world of CDK can be a little convoluted, so let’s bring everyone up to speed, shall we?
Firstly, about our characters (keep in mind some backstory has yet to be revealed and thusly these bios may be short):
K. Ceady: Our main protagonist, K is a music snob/ former music journalist with a cynical, alcoholic streak. He lives above a convience store in a one room apartment that he can barely afford. 26 years old, Bachelors in music theory
Cordance Twiggerson aka Cord: K’s “best friend,” he’s the rational one. Never one to back down from a fight and a punk rock kid at heart, he defies his personality by being incredibly intelligent and a scientific genius. 28 years old, Masters in Bioengineering
Benji Thomp: Stricken with progeria, Benji is constantly at the brunt of age related jokes as nobody knows just how old he is. He works at an assisted living home, but he may or may not also be a patient. Age unknown, didn’t finish college (studied palientology).
Annie French: Former speed addict, former coke fiend, former… you get the point. Annie is a sexual deviant who treats sex as an addiction, not as an extension of love. Aggressively punk rock, she hates all things girly and anyone who doesn’t know as much about music as she does. 26 years old, no college.
Diane Pate: K’s former stalker cum girlfriend. She likes whatever K likes: music, movies, etc. Her intense psychological issues including Bipolar disorder, trust issues and a proclivity towards ultraviolence are especially damaging to anybody who gets close to her. She may also have Aspergers, it’s hard to tell. 24 years old, no college.
LeAnne (no last name): As mysterious as she is beautiful, she is the object of Cord’s affections. Her past is shrouded for now. Age unknown (for now) college unknown (for now)
Chapter 1 (2-25)
We meet K and Cord in K’s tiny little apartment as they are about to leave to meet Benji. K intends on hooking up Benji with his best girl that is a friend Annie and living vicariously through their relationship. You see, K has always had a thing for Annie, but they got along so well that he didn’t want to jeopardize their friendship with sex. So they meet Annie at the Onerous Tap, a dive bar, and K gives Benji the best advice he can give. “No matter what you say to a woman, you are wrong. As soon as you can accept that, you can move forward.”
Introductions are made, and Annie can smell bitch on Benji. She tests him and he fails, but when he brings up his suicidal tendancies, she decides to give him a chance. Meanwhile, Cord talks with the bartender, K’s cousin, who marvels at K giving away an obviously easy lay. Back at the table, Benji runs off to use the bathroom and K and Annie have a discussion about him having no chance at sleeping with her anymore. She gives him the link to her porn website. She gets excited when Benji returns, and they leave.
Not more then a half hour later K receives a call from her to come over, since Benji fainted as soon as she took off her shirt. They proceed to fornicate above his unconscious body.
Chapter 2 (26-45)
K, being depressed upon realizing Annie only used sex as a hobby not as love, meets Diane, his stalker. Being inebriated and obsessed with Diane’s ample bosom, K agreed to be Diane’s boyfriend, not realizing the level of insanity that Diane has. At the same time, Cord meets LeAnne, who is being accosted by a particularly amorous Persian. He rescues her and falls in puppy love with her, but she seems ambivalent, so he walks her out of the bar and gets her number. Of course, her being mysterious and all, it’s not a phone number but a cryptic set of letters and numbers.
Back at Annie’s house, Benji wakes up next her naked body and believes he finally lost his virginity. This causes much jubilence. So the night closes and K is in bed with Diane, who has mistaken his hand on her butt while making out as a come on for sex. He tells her it wasn’t and she storms out. K collapses as he chases after her, a victim of blue balls.
Chapter 3 (46-78)
In the morning, Annie and Benji discuss the previous evening, but she describes the sex as excellent not realizing shes talking about K, not Benji. He is proud of himself, but when she asks for it again (from him this time!) he passes out again. Later on, they are walking down the street and meet one of Annie’s exes, a large burly man who introduced her to drugs. Benji does his best to stick up for her, and her ex walks away laughing. They then go for a drive, where Annie attempts to give him road head. This makes him pass out one more time, but this time he crashes his car into a tree.
Meanwhile, K returns to his apartment after getting coffee, only to find it darkened with Diane sitting holding a package. Getting the lights back on, she presents him with his gift, the one thing he loved the most as a child. His cat Smokey. Who died 12 years ago. K chides her for the grotesque gift and for breaking in, but she takes off her shirt and hypnotizes him with her breasts.
Quick sidenote: This comic has a lot of sci-fi/fantasy elements mixed in organically. Her magical breast powers, which are classified as “Smoosh” are one of those elements. Will I use this again in the future? I’m not sure yet.
Being calmed by her breasts, K begins to make love to Diane, but she is thrown off by his unorthodox manscaping. She makes him shave and fix it, and while doing so, he recounts his last ex. He dumped her because she did not share his love of the song 2112 by Rush. When he returns, she is gone, and all of his clothes are in little piles on the ground. A note tells him the under one pile is a landmine with a proximity detector. If he moves, he will die.
So of course he calls Cord over. Who almost set off the mine. They cower in fear until Diane returns. She tells him it was just an old camera she had that ticked. But then she gives him his second present. His ex Leigha. She attempts to kill her, but K interferes, getting cut in the process. This drives Diane completely insane, she dives out the window and breaks her arm and leg. K goes with her to the hospital, where he has her arrested, and meets with Annie, who is at Benji’s side.
Chapter 4 (79-95)
(Coming soon) Read it here
Chapter 5 (96-119)
(Coming soon) Read it here
Chapter 6 (120-present)